Welcome back! And welcome, everyone, to the 40th Official Band of the Week post! If this were a wedding anniversary, the traditional gift would be Ruby. As you and I are not married, and this is 40 weeks and not 40 years, I will instead content myself with fond memories of Pokemon Ruby.
My first advice for you as a reader this week would be to go back to read
the Part One post. This write up continues where that one left off.
To recap: John Lennon had a shitty upbringing with bad parents and tragedy all around, and turned to music to cope. He started a band called The Quarrymen. Paul McCartney and George Harrison joined that band. Lennon’s friend Stuart Sutcliffe also joined but found it to be too much work and quit. Pete Best thought it was awesome and was happy to join.
Best, Lennon, McCartney, and Harrison cut their teeth playing nightly gigs in Hamburg and then later in Liverpool. The band, now called The Beatles, got tons of buzz, got a manager, got a record deal, and went into the studio. They fired the handsome Best and replaced him with
this thing.
Lennon, McCartney, Harrison, and Starr proceeded to record seven hit albums and make some teen movies and became the biggest band in the world. Bigger, you might say, than a particular religious deity.
As we leave behind the month of Banuary and now enter Bebruary, our focus on bands with the letter B continues.
Thanks for sticking around! It is time for Part Two of
THE BEATLES. About Them With
Revolver, The Beatles had set a high-water mark in their recording careers. Many critics consider it to be the best album they would ever release.
How do you follow that up?
By doing something completely different.
The vast majority of Rock music, from the 1950’s to the present day, has been released on an album. These albums are typically between 40-80 minutes in length and contain a 7 or more songs. Fall below 40 minutes and 7 songs and you are in EP range; go above 80 minutes and you go into Double LP range. Most recordings lie somewhere in between.
The standard for songs was to put the best or most catchy ones as the first one or two tracks on either side, and to bury the rest of the tunes later on the record. This was in part because the popular songs would then be easier to play right at the start, and in part because the audio quality (particularly the bass) tended to deteriorate the closer you got to the middle of the
vinyl album. So LP records ended up being some good songs with filler.
And most of these albums are just gatherings of songs -- basically, whatever ideas the band had for songs, all thrown together, and
then pressed into vinyl (or released on Bandcamp or to Spotify or on 8-track or cassette...you get the idea). There is a whole long history of this separate from the current narrative, but suffice it to say that the album is to music what the book is to publishing: the accepted and standard form. To stretch this further, the album was like a collection of short stories, each one distinct and different from the rest. This really is still the case today. We live in a world
dominated by the single track, with most of us picking and choosing our playlists of individual songs rather than playing through an entire album.
I’m sure you can see where this is going.
The boys thought and thought and wondered how to follow up
Revolver. What followed shook the recording world to its core, and in particular sent other artists into a spiral.
The
concept album. What if the
entire album was thematically linked, and there were no throwaway tracks? What if each song was like a movement in a symphony? What if each track was not a separate short story but a chapter in a larger novel?
And so, in 1967, we get to the absolutely groundbreaking album
Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. Sure, there are some that might argue that The Beach Boys album
Pet Sounds did it first. However,
Brian Wilson famously had a nervous breakdown when he heard
Strawberry Fields Forever, a song that was cut from
Sgt. Pepper’s. He reportedly pulled over in his car, burst into tears and said, “They got there first”. So it is kinda tough to argue that The Beach Boys were the pioneers here when their own leader says they weren’t. And yes, you could argue that Frank Sinatra had done this before, as had Bing Crosby, and Nat “King” Cole, and a number of Country artists. Hell, a broad definition of what a concept album could be might even include a Christmas album.
But The Beatles did it with Rock and Roll.
Whole books have been written about
Sgt. Pepper’s. There are conspiracy theories about the photos on the cover, which contributed to the long standing tinfoil hat wearing idea that
Paul McCartney had died and was replaced by a lookalike. The cover of the album is a who’s who of important people in the 60’s.
The album revolves around the story of the fictional titular band and their experiences. From the very first tuning sounds that open the album to the haunting chord that ends
A Day In The Life, it was unlike anything that had come before. So many innovative things happened on this record that they are tough to list. It was widely considered to be the soundtrack of The Summer of Love. It used orchestral music. It was mixed with multiple takes and sound effects. There were various musical styles, sometimes within the same song. It elevated Rock music to an art form.
Oh, and if the drug use was not open enough, it also had the song
Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds. The tour for
Revolver had been disastrous. There were death threats in Japan, hate from Imelda Marcos fans in the Philippines, and John Lennon had shot his mouth off and was caught on a microphone saying that The Beatles were
“more popular than Jesus”. He also met and started hanging out with a woman named
Yoko Ono. That one did not sit well with fans in the
Bible Belt, and led to riots and
record burning. The Jesus comment, not the Yoko thing.
So when the band spent months in the studio, expectations for
Sgt. Pepper’s were high. Some wanted the band to succeed and others were (quite literally) praying for them to fail.
As it turns out
Jesus is also a Beatles fan. Allegedly. Not sure if he was a Yoko fan though.
Sgt. Pepper’s won multiple Grammy awards, went to number one everywhere, and remains a cultural landmark in recording. Its influence cannot be overstated. Our very own QotSA famously did their own
concept album in Songs For the Deaf, following the groundbreaking trail The Beatles had blazed.
The most interesting thing that happened, though, was that The Beatles flat out stopped touring. They just did not do it. They wanted to make music, and they wanted to do it in the studio. The
Revolver tour was so terrible that they did not want a repeat of it, and the work on
Sgt. Pepper’s was so amazing that they wanted to spend more time recording.
Just by way of comparison,
Sgt. Pepper’s took The Beatles over 700 hours to record. Compare this with their first album -
Please Please Me - which they reeled off in 13 hours.
Since the band refused to tour, the studio wanted to find a way to still
milk that cash cow keep The Beatles relevant in popular culture. Immediately after their landmark concept album, they conceived of a made for TV movie. This would be called the
Magical Mystery Tour.
It was awful.
Today, we mostly know the name from the song. The BBC TV movie was a series of vignettes and short sketches loosely connected about a group of people on a ‘mystery tour’ - essentially a bus trip where the destinations are a surprise. In this story, the tour members meet a group of ‘magicians’ (our heroes) who take the tour members on weird adventures.
There is
a coordinated attack on a stuffed cow. There is an incomprehensible Drill Sergeant. There is a spaghetti incident. People watch strippers. The guests walk on tables. There was a sequence where the band were selling ice cream and lollipops. A man chases women around a pool. There was even footage from
Dr. Strangelove for a flying sequence. Nothing made sense, and the public reaction was a resounding thumbs down.
You know how when you are high or drunk, certain things make total sense? Like, it was totally a good idea to call your ex and try to get back together?
Magical Mystery Tour was like that. It made sense to the band when they made it, but when they saw the final product it was utter trash…
just like my ex. After it aired McCartney went on TV to make a public apology for it. In fact, the reception was so poor that no one even bothered to keep the original negatives of the film.
The only good thing to come out the film was
the EP of the same name, which had the title track and
The Fool on the Hill and
Hello Goodbye and the monster single
All You Need is Love. That last song was actually released as part of a live TV event in the summer of 1967 and was absolutely huge for the band. It didn’t appear in the TV show but it was added to the soundtrack for later releases.
But what was on the album and on the TV show was the completely fucked up and drug induced track
I Am the Walrus.
The track is a complete and utter drug trip, written by John under the influence of LSD. The Beatles were just trying to show that they could write absolutely anything and make it popular. Seriously, a Walrus? Egg men? Corn flake sitting? Lewis Carrol references? Lennon deliberately wrote the lyrics to confound and confuse scholars who were trying to analyze the band’s work. After he completed it he famously quipped, “Let the fuckers work that one out.”
And the drugs don't stop there. Just listen to
Blue Jay Way,
Flying, and the ever insane
Strawberry Field Forever. If you’ve somehow never heard any of these, you’re in for a wild ride.
Yet all the same, contemporary critics were not impressed with the album.
The TV film was a mess, and even though history has vindicated the soundtrack, it was largely panned at the time as well, due to how much critics hated the film.
Instead of doing something more in line with their fun and fluffy previous movies, the band doubled down on the drugs with
Yellow Submarine. But in a kid-friendly kind of way. Sort of.
This animated film is set in
Pepperland, which is a beautiful, peaceful and idyllic country that (clearly) needed to increase their military spending.
Pepperland is immediately overrun by the armies of The Blue Meanies, led by
Venuz B Meanie, known as ‘His Blueness’ and his fierce weapon,
the Dreadful Flying Glove. Yeah, you read that right.
What is even weirder for you right now is that while this movie plot doesn’t make a lot of sense, it is way easier to follow than the lyrics in
I am the Walrus, so you are just letting it go.
Basically, the film revolves around the journey of
Young Fred, the last free person in Pepperland, to find and recruit The Beatles to journey back to Pepperland to help overthrow the Blue Meanies. This is accomplished, and the Meanies are then assimilated into Pepperland culture. In this process multiple Beatles songs, old and new, are worked into the script and performed. The band
only appear at the end of the movie in a short live action sequence. The voices of their animated counterparts were provided by actors.
While the animation in the film looks rudimentary and was immediately out of date (for reference,
The Flintstones, The Jetsons, and
Scooby-Doo look more realistic and have better movement), the film was whimsical and fun and wayyyyyyy better than
Magical Mystery Tour. In fact, the movie has had a lasting impact and continues to resonate today. If you don’t believe me, consider this: in
Avengers: Endgame,
Iron Man calls Nebula a Blue Meanie. Which is actually accurate, all things considered.
The soundtrack of the movie - including the new tracks
All Together Now,
Hey Bulldog, and
Only a Northern Song - was released as the band’s tenth album. Also included on this release (since it was also in the movie) were
Yellow Submarine (duh) and
All You Need is Love (again). The flip side of the vinyl was all the orchestral numbers from the film. This became their tenth studio album, and was (essentially)
a record to satisfy the studio rather than a true new effort.
If you are
a Beatles nerd, you’ll notice that I have not yet mentioned their ninth album, and just referred to their tenth.
This is because it took a while to actually animate
Yellow Submarine (though it in part looks like it was drawn by
some talented 11 year olds as a school project). The live action bit at the end of the movie was recorded before the band famously went on
a retreat to India and then went on to record
The Beatles (which most people call
the White Album ).
So after a disastrous
Magical Mystery Tour and leaving the animators to spend almost a year completing
Yellow Submarine, The Beatles decided that they wanted to go on a vacation.
Doesn’t a vacation sound nice? Remember when we could actually go and visit other
exotic locations?
This vacation was not just to be a chance for the band to decompress - it was for them to go and take a three month course in guided meditation led by
Maharishi Mahesh Yogi in Rishikesh, India. The goal was to seek out Eastern wisdom and a new outlook on life. It was a deliberate attempt to achieve enlightenment and inner peace.
Have you ever gone on vacation with friends from work?
It rarely goes well. You learn a lot about your friends that you probably did not ever want to know, and they see you at your worst. Like,
too much information kinda stuff.
This trip was worse than that.
To be fair, the upside of this trip to India was a
prolific explosion of songwriting. The downside was the trip itself was a
complete shit show, and the Maharishi totally hit on a number of the wives and girlfriends of the band. Ringo tapped out before two weeks had gone by. McCartney lasted a month, and Lennon and Harrison made it two months before they also quit.
The fact that they all went there together but left separately was a real indicator of not only how bad the retreat went, but of how the band members were growing apart. There had been some foreshadowing of this. When Pete Best was the most popular Beatle, he was
turfed by the other three. Lennon especially had been jealous of Best’s growing fame in the group he had founded. If one takes a look at the Lennon/McCartney songwriting partnership, it is clear that the early Beatles records were dominated by Lennon. But McCartney’s incredible talent as a songwriter - as evidenced by
Yesterday and
Eleanor Rigby - was
quickly growing to eclipse Lennon’s own. Many music critics have stated that the early Beatles were about Lennon, but the second half of their catalogue are about McCartney.
This was a huge problem for
Lennon. Plus Lennon was now dating
Yoko Ono. Ono was almost 10 years older than Lennon, and became the
missing mother figure in his life.
Lennon had met Cynthia Powell at the Liverpool College of Art and had married her in 1962 when she got pregnant. His son Julian was born in 1963 and because The Beatles were touring, he did not see him for three days.
Powell’s marriage to Lennon was kept secret so that Lennon could still attract young female fans. It is a matter of record that Lennon beat Cynthia. Remembering this behavior, Lennon said: “I used to be cruel to my woman, and physically - any woman. I was a hitter.” After coming home from a holiday, she found Lennon and Ono together in her home wearing bathrobes. Her marriage was over.
Lennon was barely involved in raising Julian, and remained distant and absent in his upbringing. Julian Lennon famously grew closer to Paul McCartney than to his own father. The elder Lennon spent years in the 1970’s focusing on his relationship with Ono and his other son rather than with Julian. In his will, John Lennon left his first born son almost
nothing. The other Beatles - especially McCartney - did not approve of Lennon’s behavior with his wife and son. This contributed to their dislike of Ono.
Ono was an avant garde artist in her own right, and had met Lennon at an art show in 1966. She had been married twice before she met Lennon. According to accounts, when they met, she had no idea who he was. But she soon
learned he was a millionaire musician and wanted to sell him her art. She continued to reach out to him and Lennon grew more and more intrigued by her.
So there were deep divides in the band when they recorded the White Album, and
those divides turned up in the music.
Conceived as a counterpart and opposite pole to
Sgt. Pepper’s,
The Beatles was a double album without any unifying theme.
Sgt. Pepper’s had one central concept and an incredibly busy cover;
The Beatles was a disparate and fractured double-LP with
absolutely zero cover art. One album inspired
Weezer and
Metallica; the other did not.
Many of the songs on the White Album had been conceived and written in India. The tensions that had surfaced in India continued into the studio. For the first time, legendary producer George Martin grew so frustrated with the band during the recording sessions that he left and took a vacation.
Ringo Starr flat out quit the band for two weeks during these sessions before the other members asked him back, leading McCartney to do the drumming on
Back in the U.S.S.R and
Dear Prudence. Lennon refused to collaborate with McCartney on songwriting at all, calling efforts like
Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da “granny music shit”. Lennon also brought Ono to the recording sessions, which ticked everyone else off.
The band had started their own corporations and label - Apple - and the White Album was released on that new label. But instead of the album being a unified effort, it really ended up being a set of quasi-solo projects. The band members described the recording process as difficult and fractious, and the songs themselves were George with the Beatles, John with the Beatles, Paul with the Beatles. Also, Ringo was (sometimes) there.
Revolver and
Sgt. Pepper’s may be their best albums, but
The Beatles undoubtedly had some of their greatest songs. And it was clear that the best songs on the album were almost all McCartney songs.
Back in the U.S.S.R,
Blackbird,
Helter Skelter,
Why Don’t We Do It in the Road? and
Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da were all immediately successful. Contrast these with Lennon’s efforts of
Julia,
Dear Prudence,
Glass Onion,
Sexy Sadie and
Revolution. Only the latter song became a bona fide hit. Harrison even had a better song in
While My Guitar Gently Weeps on the album than any of Lennon’s efforts.
But the best song that came out of these sessions, and maybe the greatest Beatles song of all time, did not even make the album. Released as a non-album single to promote Apple records in 1968,
Hey Jude is perhaps the definitive Beatles song and, like
Yesterday before it, is clearly a Paul McCartney tune. Even if you are not a fan of them you know this song. I honestly defy you to not sing along with the outro. The band themselves knew immediately how great it was, and released it with
Revolution as a B-Side. Only Lennon dissented with that plan (which was not a shocker).
Hey Jude was an
international number one hit. In a time of war and turmoil, it was interpreted as a plea for kindness and positivity. But the truth was that it was McCartney’s heartfelt message to young Julian Lennon - who would have been five years old at the time - about how, despite the fact that his father had ignored him, things would get better. And while that may not have ended up being strictly true for young
Jude Julian, the message of hope struck a chord with audiences everywhere.
In an effort to try to mend some of the cracks in the band, Paul McCartney conceived of a film and album idea to capture some of the creative process. For the first time, the band entered the studio without producer George Martin, and turned to producer
Phil Spector for the project. McCartney had wanted the band to tour again, but he was alone in this. He instead thought up the idea of filming the recording sessions and a live concert and putting it all together as a movie with a soundtrack. The working title of this project was
Get Back. The band wrote a song of the same name to go with it. A photo shoot was done to mirror the cover of
Please Please Me, and to show the change over time in the band while at the same time getting back to their roots. They brought in camera crews to document the process.
The band did their final public performance on January 30, 1969
on the roof of the studio, which was captured on film. But behind the scenes things completely fell apart and the band lapsed into angry lethargy. Harrison and Lennon allegedly got into a fistfight during the sessions. While a bunch of songs were recorded, the album and film project was left unfinished.
After this failure to produce an album, the band recognized that they needed George Martin to unify them. Martin agreed to produce another album with The Beatles provided that the band - and especially John Lennon - would do exactly what he told them to do, and be disciplined and professional.
The Beatles
agreed. The result was the album
Abbey Road which, for some reason, has been canonically called
their Gayest Album. I am really not sure why I am including this information but seeing as I saw this in my research, you now have to as well.
The cover of
Abbey Road has the iconic photo of the four members of the band crossing the street. The photo has become a cultural touchstone and the site of it is now a common fan destination, with people going with friends to recreate the shot. It also reinforced the urban myth that
Paul McCartney had died and was replaced by an imposter. Some interpreted the picture as Lennon, in white, being a Christ-like figure leading the others, with Ringo, in black, being an
undertaker, followed by McCartney, barefoot, as a corpse, and Harrison, in denim, as the gravedigger.
To me, that seems like both a huge stretch and that someone had a ton of extra time on their hands to conceive of
this kind of nonsense.
But others would point out that McCartney had a cigarette in his right hand - and he was left handed. They also said that the license plate of the car behind him, which read ‘28IF’, meant that McCartney would have been 28 if he had lived.
Again, a huge stretch. But this urban myth not only sold a lot of tinfoil, it contributed to the sales of the album. With tracks like
Come Together,
Something,
Octopus’ Garden,
Carry That Weight and
Here Comes the Sun, it is loaded with Beatles classics. It even had an upbeat tune about a serial killer in
Maxwell’s Silver Hammer. The 2nd half medley, capped off with
The End, is a beautiful finale. But the cracks in the relationships were all still there. Lennon tried to insist that all of the songs that he had written on Abbey Road be on one side, almost as a Lennon EP. Martin refused. Lennon dismissed and derided McCartney’s work on the album.
Abbey Road would be the last time the Beatles would record together. In fact, six days before the album was released, Lennon formally quit the group.
The Beatles were over. McCartney publicly declared that the band were no more in April of 1970.
The movie footage from
Get Back and the songs recorded for it were the only unreleased material that the band had left. Phil Spector mixed and remixed the album a number of times before it was finally released, along with the film, under the name
Let it Be. Even though people knew the band had broken up and were done, this was their swan song.
Released in May of 1970, it was not without controversy. Phil Spector added banter and chatter captured in the recording process, as well as orchestral parts and overdubs to a number of songs - most notably
The Long and Winding Road. These additions
did not sit well with McCartney. And while the album would win an Academy Award for the Best Original Score, McCartney would eventually release a revised version of the album called
Let it Be...Naked with Spector’s additions removed.
Two of Us and
Across the Universe and
Get Back and the (now) title track of
Let it Be are Beatles classics that may have been born out of conflict, but are amazing songs nonetheless.
After the breakup of The Beatles, each of the members went on to have continued success in music. Harrison released solo albums, did a famous international concert for Bangladesh, personally funded and supported the
Monty Python movie Life of Brian, formed and toured with The Traveling Wilburys, and survived being stabbed with a kitchen knife by a deranged fan in 1999. He died of cancer in 2001. He was 58.
John Lennon
did much in his time after the Beatles. He and Yoko Ono would be married in 1969. They famously held peace protests and
Bagisms and Bed-ins in support of anti-war efforts. His first solo song was
Give Peace a Chance, which has become an anti-war anthem. Ono and Lennon had one son, Sean Lennon, in 1975.
Lennon had a successful solo career and moved to New York City. He remained largely estranged from Paul McCartney for the rest of his life. He was murdered in New York in 1980, which created an outpouring of international grief.
Ringo Starr released a number of albums on his own in the 1970’s. His music was most notably done in collaborative efforts with other artists, including Quincy Jones, Maurice Gibb, Elton John and Marc Bolan. He even collaborated with Lennon and Ono’s Plastic Ono Band. After Lennon’s death, he collaborated with Harrison on
All Those Years Ago as a tribute to Lennon. Through the 1990’s and into the 2000’s he toured with his
All-Starr Band, a supergroup which at times included Tom Petty, Joe Walsh, and Jeff Lynne. He would play originals, Beatles tunes, and songs by other band members. He was knighted by Prince William in 2018.
He is still alive today..
Immediately after The Beatles, Paul McCartney founded
the band Wings, which became one of the most successful bands of the 1970’s, with seven platinum albums. With songs like
Maybe I’m Amazed and
Jet and
Live and Let Die and
Helen Wheels, he continued to top the charts for decades. His tours would include Beatles tunes as well as the new material, satisfying both sides of his fan base. He has collaborated with artists ranging from Dave Grohl to Michael Jackson. He was knighted in 1997 by Queen Elizabeth. He has an asteroid named after him. The guy is, to this day, a living music legend.
And he played a private concert for Josh.
Look,
The Beatles are quite simply an amazing band that have influenced everyone. If you haven’t heard of them, I envy you - because you have so much to discover.
Enjoy!
Links to QOTSA Check out the deep respect that Josh Homme has for
George Harrison in this video where he is given the opportunity to play Harrison’s guitar. It is moving.
Josh Homme and Sir Paul McCartney both worked on the Dave Grohl project
Sound City. Apparently, McCartney was
almost a member of Them Crooked Vultures - but learned from Dave Grohl that John Paul Jones already had the gig.
McCartney also went out of his way to
play a show out in the desert for Josh and 300 fans. Imagine Sir Paul McCartney performing a show just for you. That is just amazing.
Their Music Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band With A Little Help From My Friends A Day In The Life Strawberry Fields Forever Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds Magical Mystery Tour I Am The Walrus All You Need Is Love All Together Now Back In The U.S.S.R. Blackbird Helter Skelter Revolution While My Guitar Gently Weeps Hey Jude Get Back Come Together Maxwell’s Silver Hammer The Long And Winding Road Two Of Us Let It Be Show Them Some Love /Beatles - a huge subreddit with over 125,000 members.
/TheBeatles - almost 26,000 members.
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dog,house,fork,pink,Sonic,street,Nasa,arm,fast,tunnel,full,library,pet shop,Yoshi,Russia,drum kit,Android,Finn and Jake,price tag,Tooth Fairy,bus stop,rain,heart,face,tower,bank,cheeks,Batman,speaker,Thor,skinny,electric guitar,belly,cute,ice cream truck,bubble gum,top hat,Pink Panther,hand,bald,freckles,clover,armpit,Japan,thin,traffic,spaghetti,Phineas and Ferb,broken heart,fingertip,funny,poisonous,Wonder Woman,Squidward,Mark Zuckerberg,twig,red,China,dream,Dora,daisy,France,Discord,toenail,positive,forehead,earthquake,iron,Zeus,Mercedes,Big Ben,supermarket,Bugs Bunny,Yin and Yang,drink,rock,drum,piano,white,bench,fall,royal,seashell,Audi,stomach,aquarium,Bitcoin,volleyball,marshmallow,Cat Woman,underground,Green Lantern,bottle flip,toothbrush,globe,sand,zoo,west,puddle,lobster,North Korea,Luigi,bamboo,Great Wall,Kim Jong-un,bad,credit card,swimming pool,Wolverine,head,hair,Yoda,Elsa,turkey,heel,maracas,clean,droplet,cinema,poor,stamp,Africa,whistle,Teletubby,wind,Aladdin,tissue box,fire truck,Usain Bolt,water gun,farm,iPad,well,warm,booger,WhatsApp,Skype,landscape,pine cone,Mexico,slow,organ,fish bowl,teddy bear,John Cena,Frankenstein,tennis racket,gummy bear,Mount Rushmore,swing,Mario,lake,point,vein,cave,smell,chin,desert,scary,Dracula,airport,kiwi,seaweed,incognito,Pluto,statue,hairy,strawberry,low,invisible,blindfold,tuna,controller,Paypal,King Kong,neck,lung,weather,Xbox,tiny,icicle,flashlight,scissors,emoji,strong,saliva,firefighter,salmon,basketball,spring,Tarzan,red carpet,drain,coral reef,nose ring,caterpillar,Wall-e,seat belt,polar bear,Scooby Doo,wave,sea,grass,pancake,park,lipstick,pickaxe,east,grenade,village,Flash,throat,dizzy,Asia,petal,Gru,country,spaceship,restaurant,copy,skin,glue stick,Garfield,equator,blizzard,golden apple,Robin Hood,fast food,barbed wire,Bill Gates,Tower of Pisa,neighborhood,lightsaber,video game,high heels,dirty,flamethrower,pencil sharpener,hill,old,flute,cheek,violin,fireball,spine,bathtub,cell phone,breath,open,Australia,toothpaste,Tails,skyscraper,cowbell,rib,ceiling fan,Eminem,Jimmy Neutron,photo frame,barn,sandstorm,Jackie Chan,Abraham Lincoln,T-rex,pot of gold,KFC,shell,poison,acne,avocado,study,bandana,England,Medusa,scar,Skittles,Pokemon,branch,Dumbo,factory,Hollywood,deep,knuckle,popular,piggy bank,Las Vegas,microphone,Tower Bridge,butterfly,slide,hut,shovel,hamburger,shop,fort,Ikea,planet,border,panda,highway,swamp,tropical,lightbulb,Kermit,headphones,jungle,Reddit,young,trumpet,cheeseburger,gas mask,apartment,manhole,nutcracker,Antarctica,mansion,bunk bed,sunglasses,spray paint,Jack-o-lantern,saltwater,tank,cliff,campfire,palm,pumpkin,elephant,banjo,nature,alley,fireproof,earbuds,crossbow,Elon Musk,quicksand,Playstation,Hawaii,good,corn dog,Gandalf,dock,magic wand,field,Solar System,photograph,ukulele,James Bond,The Beatles,Katy Perry,pirate ship,Poseidon,Netherlands,photographer,Lego,hourglass,glass,path,hotel,ramp,dandelion,Brazil,coral,cigarette,messy,Dexter,valley,parachute,wine glass,matchbox,Morgan Freeman,black hole,midnight,astronaut,paper bag,sand castle,forest fire,hot sauce,social media,William Shakespeare,trash can,fire alarm,lawn mower,nail polish,Band-Aid,Star Wars,clothes hanger,toe,mud,coconut,jaw,bomb,south,firework,sailboat,loading,iPhone,toothpick,BMW,ketchup,fossil,explosion,Finn,Einstein,infinite,dictionary,Photoshop,trombone,clarinet,rubber,saxophone,helicopter,temperature,bus driver,cello,London,newspaper,blackberry,shopping cart,Florida,Daffy Duck,mayonnaise,gummy worm,flying pig,underweight,Crash Bandicoot,bungee jumping,kindergarten,umbrella,hammer,night,laser,glove,square,Morty,firehouse,dynamite,chainsaw,melon,waist,Chewbacca,kidney,stoned,Rick,ticket,skateboard,microwave,television,soil,exam,cocktail,India,Colosseum,missile,hilarious,Popeye,nuke,silo,chemical,museum,Vault boy,adorable,fast forward,firecracker,grandmother,Porky Pig,roadblock,continent,wrinkle,shaving cream,Northern Lights,tug,London Eye,Israel,shipwreck,xylophone,motorcycle,diamond,root,coffee,princess,Oreo,goldfish,wizard,chocolate,garbage,ladybug,shotgun,kazoo,Minecraft,video,message,lily,fisherman,cucumber,password,western,ambulance,doorknob,glowstick,makeup,barbecue,jazz,hedgehog,bark,tombstone,coast,pitchfork,Christmas,opera,office,insect,hunger,download,hairbrush,blueberry,cookie jar,canyon,Happy Meal,high five,fern,quarter,peninsula,imagination,microscope,table tennis,whisper,fly swatter,pencil case,harmonica,Family Guy,New Zealand,apple pie,warehouse,cookie,USB,jellyfish,bubble,battery,fireman,pizza,angry,taco,harp,alcohol,pound,bedtime,megaphone,husband,oval,rail,stab,dwarf,milkshake,witch,bakery,president,weak,second,sushi,mall,complete,hip hop,slippery,horizon,prawn,plumber,blowfish,Madagascar,Europe,bazooka,pogo stick,Terminator,Hercules,notification,snowball fight,high score,Kung Fu,Lady Gaga,geography,sledgehammer,bear trap,sky,cheese,vine,clown,catfish,snowman,bowl,waffle,vegetable,hook,shadow,dinosaur,lane,dance,scarf,cabin,Tweety,bookshelf,swordfish,skyline,base,straw,biscuit,Greece,bleach,pepper,reflection,universe,skateboarder,triplets,gold chain,electric car,policeman,electricity,mother,Bambi,croissant,Ireland,sandbox,stadium,depressed,Johnny Bravo,silverware,raspberry,dandruff,Scotland,comic book,cylinder,Milky Way,taxi driver,magic trick,sunrise,popcorn,eat,cola,cake,pond,mushroom,rocket,surfboard,baby,cape,glasses,sunburn,chef,gate,charger,crack,mohawk,triangle,carpet,dessert,taser,afro,cobra,ringtone,cockroach,levitate,mailman,rockstar,lyrics,grumpy,stand,Norway,binoculars,nightclub,puppet,novel,injection,thief,pray,chandelier,exercise,lava lamp,lap,massage,thermometer,golf cart,postcard,bell pepper,bed bug,paintball,Notch,yogurt,graffiti,burglar,butler,seafood,Sydney Opera House,Susan Wojcicki,parents,bed sheet,Leonardo da Vinci,intersection,palace,shrub,lumberjack,relationship,observatory,junk food,eye,log,dice,bicycle,pineapple,camera,circle,lemonade,soda,comb,cube,Doritos,love,table,honey,lighter,broccoli,fireplace,drive,Titanic,backpack,emerald,giraffe,world,internet,kitten,volume,Spain,daughter,armor,noob,rectangle,driver,raccoon,bacon,lady,bull,camping,poppy,snowball,farmer,lasso,breakfast,oxygen,milkman,caveman,laboratory,bandage,neighbor,Cupid,Sudoku,wedding,seagull,spatula,atom,dew,fortress,vegetarian,ivy,snowboard,conversation,treasure,chopsticks,garlic,vacuum,swimsuit,divorce,advertisement,vuvuzela,Mr Bean,Fred Flintstone,pet food,upgrade,voodoo,punishment,Charlie Chaplin,Rome,graduation,beatbox,communism,yeti,ear,dots,octagon,kite,lion,winner,muffin,cupcake,unicorn,smoke,lime,monster,Mars,moss,summer,lollipop,coffin,paint,lottery,wife,pirate,sandwich,lantern,seahorse,Cuba,archer,sweat,deodorant,plank,Steam,birthday,submarine,zombie,casino,gas,stove,helmet,mosquito,ponytail,corpse,subway,spy,jump rope,baguette,grin,centipede,gorilla,website,text,workplace,bookmark,anglerfish,wireless,Zorro,sports,abstract,detective,Amsterdam,elevator,chimney,reindeer,Singapore,perfume,soldier,bodyguard,magnifier,freezer,radiation,assassin,yawn,backbone,disaster,giant,pillow fight,grasshopper,Vin Diesel,geyser,burrito,celebrity,Lasagna,Pumba,karaoke,hypnotize,platypus,Leonardo DiCaprio,bird bath,battleship,back pain,rapper,werewolf,Black Friday,cathedral,Sherlock Holmes,ABBA,hard hat,sword,mirror,toilet,eggplant,jelly,hero,starfish,bread,snail,person,plunger,computer,nosebleed,goat,joker,sponge,mop,owl,beef,portal,genie,crocodile,murderer,magic,pine,winter,robber,pepperoni,shoebox,fog,screen,son,folder,mask,Goofy,Mercury,zipline,wall,dragonfly,zipper,meatball,slingshot,Pringles,circus,mammoth,nugget,mousetrap,recycling,revolver,champion,zigzag,meat,drought,vodka,notepad,porcupine,tuba,hacker,broomstick,kitchen,cheesecake,satellite,JayZ,squirrel,leprechaun,jello,gangster,raincoat,eyeshadow,shopping,gardener,scythe,portrait,jackhammer,allergy,honeycomb,headache,Miniclip,Mona Lisa,cheetah,virtual reality,virus,Argentina,blanket,military,headband,superpower,language,handshake,reptile,thirst,fake teeth,duct tape,macaroni,color-blind,comfortable,Robbie Rotten,coast guard,cab driver,pistachio,Angelina Jolie,autograph,sea lion,Morse code,clickbait,star,girl,lemon,alarm,shoe,soap,button,kiss,grave,telephone,fridge,katana,switch,eraser,signature,pasta,flamingo,crayon,puzzle,hard,juice,socks,crystal,telescope,galaxy,squid,tattoo,bowling,lamb,silver,lid,taxi,basket,step,stapler,pigeon,zoom,teacher,holiday,score,Tetris,frame,garden,stage,unicycle,cream,sombrero,error,battle,starfruit,hamster,chalk,spiral,bounce,hairspray,lizard,victory,balance,hexagon,Ferrari,MTV,network,weapon,fist fight,vault,mattress,viola,birch,stereo,Jenga,plug,chihuahua,plow,pavement,wart,ribbon,otter,magazine,Bomberman,vaccine,elder,Romania,champagne,semicircle,Suez Canal,Mr Meeseeks,villain,inside,spade,gravedigger,Bruce Lee,gentle,stingray,can opener,funeral,jet ski,wheelbarrow,thug,undo,fabulous,space suit,cappuccino,Minotaur,skydiving,cheerleader,Stone Age,Chinatown,razorblade,crawl space,cauldron,trick shot,Steve Jobs,audience,time machine,sewing machine,face paint,truck driver,x-ray,fly,salt,spider,boy,dollar,turtle,book,chain,dolphin,sing,milk,wing,pencil,snake,scream,toast,vomit,salad,radio,potion,dominoes,balloon,monkey,trophy,feather,leash,loser,bite,notebook,happy,Mummy,sneeze,koala,tired,sick,pipe,jalapeno,diaper,deer,priest,youtuber,boomerang,pro,ruby,hop,hopscotch,barcode,vote,wrench,tissue,doll,clownfish,halo,Monday,tentacle,grid,Uranus,oil,scarecrow,tarantula,germ,glow,haircut,Vatican,tape,judge,cell,diagonal,science,mustard,fur,janitor,ballerina,pike,nun,chime,tuxedo,Cerberus,panpipes,surface,coal,knot,willow,pajamas,fizz,student,eclipse,asteroid,Portugal,pigsty,brand,crowbar,chimpanzee,Chuck Norris,raft,carnival,treadmill,professor,tricycle,apocalypse,vitamin,orchestra,groom,cringe,knight,litter box,macho,brownie,hummingbird,Hula Hoop,motorbike,type,catapult,take off,wake up,concert,floppy disk,BMX,bulldozer,manicure,brainwash,William Wallace,guinea pig,motherboard,wheel,brick,egg,lava,queen,gold,God,ladder,coin,laptop,toaster,butter,bag,doctor,sit,tennis,half,Bible,noodle,golf,eagle,cash,vampire,sweater,father,remote,safe,jeans,darts,graph,nothing,dagger,stone,wig,cupboard,minute,match,slime,garage,tomb,soup,bathroom,llama,shampoo,swan,frown,toolbox,jacket,adult,crate,quill,spin,waiter,mint,kangaroo,captain,loot,maid,shoelace,luggage,cage,bagpipes,loaf,aircraft,shelf,safari,afterlife,napkin,steam,coach,slope,marigold,Mozart,bumper,Asterix,vanilla,papaya,ostrich,failure,scoop,tangerine,firefly,centaur,harbor,uniform,Beethoven,Intel,moth,Spartacus,fluid,acid,sparkles,talent show,ski jump,polo,ravioli,delivery,woodpecker,logo,Stegosaurus,diss track,Darwin Watterson,filmmaker,silence,dashboard,echo,windshield,Home Alone,tablecloth,backflip,headboard,licorice,sunshade,Picasso,airbag,water cycle,meatloaf,insomnia,broom,whale,pie,demon,bed,braces,fence,orange,sleep,gift,Popsicle,spear,zebra,Saturn,maze,chess,wire,angel,skates,pyramid,shower,claw,hell,goal,bottle,dress,walk,AC/DC,tampon,goatee,prince,flask,cut,cord,roof,movie,ash,tiger,player,magician,wool,saddle,cowboy,derp,suitcase,sugar,nest,anchor,onion,magma,limbo,collar,mole,bingo,walnut,wealth,security,leader,melt,Gandhi,arch,toy,turd,scientist,hippo,glue,kneel,orbit,below,totem,health,towel,diet,crow,addiction,minigolf,clay,boar,navy,butcher,trigger,referee,bruise,translate,yearbook,confused,engine,poke,wreath,omelet,gravity,bride,godfather,flu,accordion,engineer,cocoon,minivan,bean bag,antivirus,billiards,rake,cement,cauliflower,espresso,violence,blender,chew,bartender,witness,hobbit,corkscrew,chameleon,cymbal,Excalibur,grapefruit,action,outside,guillotine,timpani,frostbite,leave,Mont Blanc,palette,electrician,fitness trainer,journalist,fashion designer,bucket,penguin,sheep,torch,robot,peanut,UFO,belt,Earth,magnet,dragon,soccer,desk,search,seal,scribble,gender,food,anvil,crust,bean,hockey,pot,pretzel,needle,blimp,plate,drool,frog,basement,idea,bracelet,cork,sauce,gang,sprinkler,shout,morning,poodle,karate,bagel,wolf,sausage,heat,wasp,calendar,tadpole,religion,hose,sleeve,acorn,sting,market,marble,comet,pain,cloth,drawer,orca,hurdle,pinball,narwhal,pollution,metal,race,end,razor,dollhouse,distance,prism,pub,lotion,vanish,vulture,beanie,burp,periscope,cousin,customer,label,mold,kebab,beaver,spark,meme,pudding,almond,mafia,gasp,nightmare,mermaid,season,gasoline,evening,eel,cast,hive,beetle,diploma,jeep,bulge,wrestler,Anubis,mascot,spinach,hieroglyph,anaconda,handicap,walrus,blacksmith,robin,reception,invasion,fencing,sphinx,evolution,brunette,traveler,jaguar,diagram,hovercraft,parade,dome,credit,tow truck,shallow,vlogger,veterinarian,furniture,commercial,cyborg,scent,defense,accident,marathon,demonstration,NASCAR,Velociraptor,pharmacist,Xerox,gentleman,dough,rhinoceros,air conditioner,poop,clock,carrot,cherry,candle,boots,target,wine,die,moon,airplane,think,pause,pill,pocket,Easter,horse,child,lamp,pillow,yolk,potato,pickle,nurse,ham,ninja,screw,board,pin,lettuce,console,climb,goose,bill,tortoise,sink,ski,glitter,miner,parrot,clap,spit,wiggle,peacock,roll,ballet,ceiling,celebrate,blind,yacht,addition,flock,powder,paddle,harpoon,kraken,baboon,antenna,classroom,bronze,writer,Obelix,touch,sensei,rest,puma,dent,shake,goblin,laundry,cloak,detonate,Neptune,cotton,generator,canary,horsewhip,racecar,Croatia,tip,cardboard,commander,seasick,anthill,vinegar,hippie,dentist,animation,Slinky,wallpaper,pendulum,vertical,chestplate,anime,beanstalk,survivor,florist,faucet,spore,risk,wonderland,wrestling,hazelnut,cushion,W-LAN,mayor,community,raisin,udder,oyster,sew,hazard,curry,pastry,mime,victim,mechanic,hibernate,bouncer,Iron Giant,floodlight,pear,sad,paw,space,bullet,
skribbl.io,shirt,cow,worm,king,tea,truck,pants,hashtag,DNA,bird,Monster,beer,curtain,tire,nachos,bear,cricket,teapot,nerd,deaf,fruit,meteorite,rice,sniper,sale,gnome,shock,shape,alligator,meal,nickel,party,hurt,Segway,Mr. Bean,banker,cartoon,double,hammock,juggle,pope,leak,room,throne,hoof,radar,wound,luck,swag,panther,flush,Venus,disease,fortune,porch,machine,pilot,copper,mantis,keg,biology,wax,gloss,leech,sculpture,pelican,trapdoor,plague,quilt,yardstick,lounge,teaspoon,broadcast,uncle,comedian,mannequin,peasant,streamer,oar,drama,cornfield,carnivore,wingnut,vent,cabinet,vacation,applause,vision,radish,picnic,Skrillex,jester,preach,armadillo,hyena,librarian,interview,sauna,surgeon,dishrag,manatee,symphony,queue,industry,Atlantis,excavator,canister,model,flight attendant,ghost,pig,key,banana,tomato,axe,line,present,duck,alien,peas,gem,web,grapes,corn,can,fairy,camel,paper,beak,corner,penny,dig,link,donkey,fox,rug,drip,hunter,horn,purse,gumball,pony,musket,flea,kettle,rooster,balcony,seesaw,stork,dinner,greed,bait,duel,trap,heist,origami,skunk,coaster,leather,socket,fireside,cannon,ram,filter,alpaca,Zelda,condiment,server,antelope,emu,chestnut,dalmatian,swarm,sloth,reality,Darwin,torpedo,toucan,pedal,tabletop,frosting,bellow,vortex,bayonet,margarine,orchid,beet,journey,slam,marmalade,employer,stylus,spoiler,repeat,tiramisu,cuckoo,collapse,eskimo,assault,orangutan,wrapping,albatross,mothball,evaporate,turnip,puffin,reeds,receptionist,impact,dispenser,nutshell,procrastination,architect,programmer,bricklayer,boat,bell,ring,fries,money,chair,door,bee,tail,ball,mouse,rat,window,peace,nut,blush,page,toad,hug,ace,tractor,peach,whisk,hen,day,shy,lawyer,rewind,tripod,trailer,hermit,welder,festival,punk,handle,protest,lens,attic,foil,promotion,work,limousine,patriot,badger,studio,athlete,quokka,trend,pinwheel,gravel,fabric,lemur,provoke,rune,display,nail file,embers,asymmetry,actor,carpenter,aristocrat,Zuma,chinchilla,archaeologist,apple,hat,sun,box,cat,cup,train,bunny,sound,run,barrel,barber,grill,read,family,moose,boil,printer,poster,sledge,nutmeg,heading,cruise,pillar,retail,monk,spool,catalog,scuba,anteater,pensioner,coyote,vise,bobsled,purity,tailor,meerkat,weasel,invention,lynx,kendama,zeppelin,patient,gladiator,slump,Capricorn,baklava,prune,stress,crucible,hitchhiker,election,caviar,marmot,hair roller,pistol,cone,ant,lock,hanger,cap,Mr. Meeseeks,comedy,coat,tourist,tickle,facade,shrew,diva,patio,apricot,spelunker,parakeet,barbarian,tumor,figurine,desperate,landlord,bus,mug,dog,shark,abyss,betray
Section 0: Background Hi everyone! I’m trying to tailor this a bit more to reflect the UK Money Diary style where I give context on the week before and reflect on it after. I also added in some of the questions from the recent thread about what Refinery29 should ask diarists (
see here).
I wrote this the week of Thanksgiving; my partner and I stayed in NYC instead of going home to either of our parents’ homes. We wear masks and stay socially distant when we leave the house. I’m thankful that we live close to a park and live on a block where we know and enjoy talking to our neighbors.
This was a relatively normal week for us during a pandemic, save for me spending a bit more than normal and it being Thanksgiving. We’ve both lived in the city since college and have so-so relationships with our families, so we didn’t leave for “home” when the pandemic hit.
I also just named my boyfriend instead of giving him an initial. He’s the only person I actually saw this week, but the initials always throw me off when I read these.
What do money and success mean to you? What are your end goals? It helps me to see money as a tool. I never resonate with people who say “money doesn’t buy happiness” because to a certain degree, it does. Money enables me to live the life I want.
I’m pursuing FIRE (financial independence, retire early) and hope to be financially independent (able to live off my investments) by my early 30s. To do so, I save 60%+ of my income per month. I want this because working for 40 years isn’t sustainable for me—I have a very cushy tech job and
still get anxiety and rage about waking up every morning to work, the rat race, and being paid inequitably to male peers. I’d like to give myself the option to leave this world as soon as possible.
As an alternative, I could see myself successful if I open a product consultancy, where I advise early-stage startups on product management, what to build for their MVP, and product-market fit. I’m really interested in tech ethics and the questionable practices in venture capital, so I’d love to be in a place where I could be picky about what clients I take and help truly mission-driven businesses thrive. I could see this also working as a small business incubator—why not apply what works in startups to small businesses?
I don’t yet have a firm picture of what I’d like my life to look like when I retire. I’m interested in spending a lot of time reading, traveling to new places for extended periods of time, and potentially writing a book. I get extremely interested in niche topics. Right now if I had to guess, I’d be writing a book about the ways multi-level marketing companies (MLMs) manipulate women.
Are you a spender or a saver? Definitely a saver. My partner is more of a spender, and we’ve influenced each other well. Seeing him spend money on himself for video games helps me realize I can spend more money on myself for things I just want (see my big purchase for myself this week).
In turn, seeing me save a lot of money has motivated him to up his 401k contribution and overall savings. He’s also interested in FIRE, although I’d say my timeline is more aggressive.
If you could go back in time, what's the one piece of financial advice you would give to your past self? Learn about investing, look up the terms you don’t know, and start doing it as soon as possible. Ask questions to people you know or on the internet.
On to the diary!
Section One: Assets and Debt Investment Balance $131,175
- Retirement (includes 2 company 401ks and 1 rollover IRA): $55,730
- Brokerage: $27,233
- Roth IRA: $25,439
- Managed account: $17,923
- HSA: $4,850
Equity if you're a homeowner N/A, I rent in a HCOL city. No plans to own anytime soon
Savings account balance $10,270
Checking account balance $3,433 in checking account for bills
- This fluctuates, but I try to invest anything over $2k. I’m pretty conservative with my checking account buffer, and don’t worry much about the interest I’m “losing,” especially because interest rates are so low right now
$2,518 in checking account for rent
- I keep a holdover account that’s connected to Venmo and Zelle to pay rent
Credit card debt N/A. There’s $1,348 currently on my credit cards, but I pay them all off in full each month. My parents signed me up for a credit card as soon as I was old enough and taught me about how important it was to pay in full. In fact, I think this was so hammered into my brain that doing anything other than that each month was never an option. Because of this, I’ve always thought of credit cards as similar to debit cards—only spend money you have.
Student loan debt (for what degree) I was fortunate to go to college on a full scholarship, including living expenses. I studied psychology and sociology, and I graduated without any student loan debt.
Section Two: Income Main Job Monthly Take Home: $6,570/month
I maxed out my 401k early this year, so for 8 months I was contributing $2,500/month out of my paychecks. That ended in September, so it changed my monthly take-home from about $4,650 to $6,570/month.
Deductions: - 401k: $0/month (was $2,500/month)
- Medical: $128/month
- Dental and vision: $11/month
Income Progression - I started in customer support right out of college, making $40,000/year + overtime, which ended up being about $52,000/year (thanks OT!).
- About a year later, I moved into an entry-level product role at the same company and received a raise to $60,000/year.
- The next year, I moved to a new company for a half-step promotion where I was making $82,000/year + 15% yearly bonus. The bonus was dependable enough that it was assumed as part of our total compensation, so let’s call it $95,000/year.
- Early this year, I switched companies again (noticing a theme?) for a promotion and now make $122,000/year.
I don’t have any other sources of income outside my main job. My partner makes a similar amount to me—about
$117,000/year with bonus.
Section Three: Expenses I live with my partner and we don’t have combined finances, but split many expenses 50/50. We use Splitwise to log transactions. He’s more laid-back about being paid back, but I’m much more “I don’t want to owe anyone anything, and I don’t want anyone to owe me anything” (I know, rigid, but I’m working on it!).
Splitwise is nice because it’d be ridiculous to Venmo request each other for a $4 coffee, but we can see how expenses are adding up. If someone has racked up a few hundred dollars of spending for both of us, the other person will cover our expenses for awhile. It works for us!
Rent $2,200 for a 2 bed, 1 bath apartment in Brooklyn. We split rent 50/50.
Renters insurance About $7/month for my portion. This covers all our possessions plus my boyfriend’s watches. He pays 75% of it because half of the monthly cost comes from the extra watch overage.
Savings contribution I try to have about $10,000 sitting in my savings account at any given time, because it makes me feel safe in case of an emergency. I also like the freedom it enables, in case I wanted to leave my job and take a significant amount of time off. This is already at the $10k I want, so I don’t contribute to it monthly.
Investment contribution It varies but on average I contribute $2,500/month to my brokerage account and Roth IRA (combined).
Donations I try to donate about $200/month, but it’s pretty sporadic. This month I donated to the Yellowhammer Fund and Northwest Abortion Access Fund. One of my major goals for 2021 is to step up my donations and create an actual strategy around them, potentially involving a donor-advised fund.
Gas/electric Our gas is $20-25/month and electric is $50/month. I pay gas and Will pays electric, both go in Splitwise. About $37/month total for me.
Wifi Our wifi is $60/month, which goes into Splitwise—I pay $30/month.
Cellphone I’m still on my parents’ phone plan—sheesh! This is convincing me that I should Venmo them for it each month.
Subscriptions I pay for Hulu with ads, $5.99/month. My boyfriend pays for Netflix and we share a Spotify family plan with a couple of his friends, which I chip in $4/month for.
I also pay for the budgeting software YNAB (You Need a Budget) which is $84/year. I only pay it once a year in September.
Medical I recently had to go to the emergency room for an overnight stay and follow up with some specialists. (I’m okay!) Because of that whole shindig I’m expecting to max out my deductible (and potentially my out-of-pocket-max) right at the end of the year. This will be about
$4,000, but none of the claims have come through yet so I’m not sure of the exact total. I have a category in my budget for my deductible, and the rest will come out of my emergency fund.
Physical therapy This month I’m starting pelvic floor physical therapy for dyspareunia (pain with intercourse).
I’d tried everything the internet suggested (“just relaaaaaax”) before getting the courage to find a new ob-gyn and ask her about it. She had some recommendations, but ultimately physical therapy was the “last resort” option that I’m now exploring.
My new physical therapist comes highly recommended but is out of network with insurance. Each session is
$250, and I’ll go once every 2-3 weeks for the next few months as part of treatment. If you’ve worked through this problem (or are experiencing it now!) I’d love to hear your experience.
Section Four: Additional Questions Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it? Absolutely. My dad was the first in his family to attend college and my parents made pretty calculated decisions about where they would live so I could go to the absolute best public school possible. Over 90% of students at my high school attend a 4-year college, and we start talking about it freshman year. To say college was encouraged in my environment is an understatement.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances? My dad has worked in finance since I was about 10. He’s always been really knowledgeable about both higher-level economic concepts and the minutiae of personal finance. My family is frugal, too: we clipped coupons and got clothes on super-sale at Kohl’s and Goodwill. I know there was a period of time when he became self-employed and money got very tight for a few years, but the bulk of those worries were largely kept from me.
Did you worry about money growing up? Yes. While we were comfortable, we lived in such an affluent place that our family was in “the middle class” of the town and it made me worry more about money than I probably needed to. Think The Stepford Wives for context.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net? In college, I became maybe 80% financially independent as I had a scholarship and worked part-time during school and over the summer, but I was still on their insurance.
I remember being frustrated in college because even though I knew I was extremely privileged, my friends in college had their parents pay their summer apartment rent and gave them an “allowance” of spending money, and I was “limited” by the options I could afford with the job I had. My dad told me at the time, “This is frustrating but it’s preparing you for actually having to live off the money you make in the near future.” (Great, great advice Dad.)
I’m technically still financially dependent on my parents for my cell phone bill, but otherwise I pay for everything: rent, insurance, utilities, food, therapy, and all wants in the form of clothing, workout classes, etc. I could ask my parents for money if I absolutely needed to, but would use it as a last resort.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain. I have an account (mentioned above) that a family friend who’s a hedge fund manager, well, manages. I believe the initial deposit was $1000 over 10 years ago, but that money wasn’t mine either, it’s all a gift. It’s not very liquid—it’d take me several months (and some very good reasoning) to get any of that money withdrawn, since it’s supposed to be for “the future” (which I guess I could argue is now?).
I might receive a small amount of money when my grandmother passes, but it’d probably be around $1-2k, if at all.
Day 1 Wednesday, November 25, 2020 8:30am Wake up and shower, take my vitamin C gummies, then make coffee. I wasn’t much of a daily coffee drinker until my offices had it for free, and now I’m definitely addicted. I don’t really care if the coffee is shitty or not, I just put some milk in it and it’s great. Right now I’m trying to drink half or three-quarter cups so I can attempt to pull back my addiction a bit. I log onto work at 9am.
11:30am Eat leftovers from last night for lunch—quesadilla + Spanish rice. There’s an incredible Mexican restaurant by us, and now I am ruined for the tacos, quesadillas and nachos from any other place.
12:30pm Will picks me up in the U-Haul. We’re driving about 20 min away to pick up a butcher block desk he bought off Craigslist, which ends up being from a small office that’s downsizing. The desk is $150 which he pays for. We love the office’s style (and the owner is super nice!) and walk around while he shows us what else he’s trying to get rid of.
We end up buying an extra-large ZZ plant and two side tables from him for an extra $120, way less than we would have paid for the quality elsewhere. My half will be $60, and I’ll split the U-Haul too, $44.51.
$82.26 2:45pm That ended up taking a lot longer than we expected! We get back and unload the van, then I bring stuff inside while Will returns the van to the U-Haul location. I jump back onto work—so much for a slow afternoon before Thanksgiving. AWS is down, which powers a lot of our engineering work (and a lot of the internet!) so a lot of our teams are basically twiddling their thumbs. We chat about how to message the outage to customers.
5:45pm Will starts making dinner (braised chicken and veggies) and I sit down to read with a strawberry Chobani, but I end up just reading Reddit and searching for new podcasts to listen to.
7:45pm Dinner was great! Now…ice cream.
9:43pm I remember that my mom sent me ideas for her and my dad’s Christmas presents, so I order on Etsy and Amazon. My dad gets a mug with an Ernest Hemingway quote (“write drunk, edit sober”) ($21.54) and a book on writing ($16.63), and my mom gets this food warming tote contraption she wanted ($43.52). We’ve been paring down Christmases over the years—this year I asked for the Europe version of Ticket to Ride.
$81.69 11:15pm I finish up the first episode of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City with some white cheddar Cheez-Its to snack on. After, I start on the dishes from dinner. I listen to the
Product Market Misfits podcast while I do dishes—the episode with Kristen Anderson from Catch is great, highly recommend if you’re tired of just hearing stories about stereotypical Silicon Valley tech companies.
Day 1 Total: $166.69 Day 2 Thursday, November 26, 2020 10am Wake up super late since I stayed up scrolling on my phone too late last night. We make coffee and set out for a long walk around 11:15am.
12:05pm At the end of our walk, we swing by our local liquor store and buy 4 bottles of wine (red, white, rose, champagne). Will pays, total is $63.15 for everything. We haven’t had wine in the apartment for ages and I’m excited to have some stocked up.
$31.57 12:30pm Get back from the walk, shower, then turn on football. I actually don’t really care about any NFL teams (I like college football a lot more), but it’s such calming background noise for me that I find myself looking for games when I have downtime. We also recently found out that Will’s friends’ dog only has a few months to live, so we order some jerky treats and a squeaky toy for him.
$14.07 2:30pm We head out to the restaurant we’re going to for Thanksgiving lunch, a local place a short walk from our apartment. They’re doing a prix fixe menu of the classics—turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, green beans, and a phenomenal tarte Tatin with ice cream for dessert.
We eat outside under heat lamps. It’s super cozy. With our bottle of wine and tip the total is $208 (I try to tip over and above the norm because it’s a pandemic
and Thanksgiving). My half will be
$104.
5:53pm Get back from the restaurant. We have a ton of leftovers which is awesome (I think it’s excessive frugality, but I almost expect to stretch takeout or restaurant meals into two meals). Exchange some texts with my friends about their socially-distant Thanksgiving celebrations.
I turn on the Washington vs. Cowboys game right at the halftime show, which is Kane Brown with the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders. They’re all wearing masks (except for Kane) and it’s so odd to see them dancing in masks. I mean, I’m glad they’re wearing them, but it just seems like we could have gone without the halftime show this year.
9:21pm I order contacts from Contacts Direct. I got a new prescription but didn’t have a great experience with the eye doctor, so I’m hesitant about this order—only ordered one box of 90 lenses for each eye instead of a year’s worth of lenses. I’ve been getting headaches pretty frequently, so I’m hoping getting a new pair of glasses and alternating those (instead of wearing my contacts for 16 hours a day, every day) will help.
$29.98 after insurance benefits
Day 2 Total: $179.62
Day 3 Friday, November 27 8:56am Wake up super last minute, run to sign onto Slack and then start grinding coffee beans. I’m online and drinking a big mug of coffee by 9:10. (So much for half cups.)
10:45am Come up for air from work and grab the stuff to make a bagel. Everything bagels and plain cream cheese are my go-to combo.
12:03pm I grab a bag of clothes to drop off at the donation bin and a couple library books to return. The library is about a 25 minute walk so it’ll be a nice lunch break diversion.
12:56pm After the library I stop by the grocery store for some paper towels and sponges, since we’re almost out. Total is $22.62, my half is
$11.31 1:09pm When I get home I jump back into work and put the USA vs. Netherlands game on my second monitor. By the 75th minute, the US is up by 2 goals so they start putting in some younger players—it’s fun to see Midge Purce and Sophia Smith play! I also throw some bagel bites in the oven for a quick snack and promise myself dinner will be healthier.
4:23pm I zone out of work and start playing Among Us. I end up playing for over two hours. We open a bottle of wine at some point and I get super tipsy.
6:50pm Turn on the tail end of the Notre Dame vs. UNC game. It turns into Jeopardy, which turns into Wheel of Fortune, which I’m not mad about. P isn’t as into the game shows and leaves to microwave a plate of leftovers from Thanksgiving dinner and play video games.
8:40pm Finally getting hungry after my bagel bites and Cheez-Its this afternoon and make a plate of Thanksgiving leftovers—turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans and cauliflower. Yum.
Will and I end up getting in a tiff about the mess in our apartment so we take a break, cool down and talk it through. I watch a couple episodes of Sister Wives and go to bed around 1:30am.
Day 3 Total: $11.31
Day 4 Saturday, November 28, 2020 10:05am I stayed up late (again) so it’s nice to sleep in. I play Among Us for awhile and have a couple rounds where I’m the impostor and get some great kills and wins. I run out into the living room and celebrate with Will. We laugh because it’s silly how much we love the games we play. Around 10:45 I start making coffee.
11am We desperately need new sheets because our fitted sheet has a huge hole at Will’s feet (and it’s growing). I search a women’s personal finance group I’m in on Facebook for recommendations and we end up buying a queen sheet set from Belk. Total was $100.71 with their sale.
$50.35 1pm I was planning on returning a package to the post office today, but forget it closes at 1pm on Saturdays so I decide to run to Target instead. I have a lampshade to return and want to look for a shower caddy as well. I also have an old iPad to return, which Will tells me I can do at Best Buy. He finds an old iPod and flip phone I can take too.
Take the MTA there ($2.75 for a single fare). When I get there, it’s a madhouse and I remember that I have sillily (is this a word?) decided to come on the weekend of Black Friday. I stand in the returns line for about 15 minutes and get $10.89 back, but ditch the idea of trying to look for a shower caddy. The checkout line looks like 100 people long.
-$8.14 because of return Next I go to Best Buy, but who am I kidding—the line to get in the store is even longer than the Target checkout line. I walk back to the subway and get on to go home.
$2.75 2:30pm Since Best Buy was a no go, I search for electronic recycling around me on the way home just to see where I could drop off the devices I have. Apparently there’s an EcoATM not too far from my subway stop. It’s more for selling devices, but if they can’t give you money for something, they’ll recycle it, which is exactly what I wanted. I put each of the pieces in the scanner, and end up getting a whopping $2 total (for Will’s old iPod). Still cool because I was just expecting to recycle it all. I’ll give Will the $2.
2:44pm There’s a Dunkin nearby so I pop in to grab a couple donuts ($2.90). There’s a woman outside asking for money, so I give her $5 cash.
$7.90 3:00pm Last stop—our favorite deli is nearby and Will mentioned he wanted to get bacon there recently. I get a 1/2 lb and salivate on the way home. This is one of those things I won’t put in Splitwise because it’s small and because it’s fun to get for P as a tiny little present.
$3.50 3:45pm Once I’m home I’m super hungry from only eating carbs all morning so I have a snack of carrots, hummus and some pepperoni. I head back out to drop off a bag of clothes and shoes at a drop box a few blocks away. The neighbors are outside at the park near our house so I stop and chat with them for a few minutes. Their kids are the cutest.
6:47pm For dinner I make a ham and cheese sandwich (panini style with rosemary butter) and more carrots and hummus. I put on another episode of Sister Wives. These people are so fascinating to me—first off, I think the husband is completely full of himself. But I’m also so curious about the wives. There are a lot of talking head testimonials where the parents explain that they’re “oppressed” because they’re different and want to go public so the world can see polygamy as a valid family style (I’m only on season 2).
I know they’re probably playing up the “we love our other sister wives and have so much fun together even without Kody” aspect because people expect sister wives to be catty and hate each other, but I can’t help but wonder why they need to be in plural marriage to get the same friendship they seem to value so much. I also doubt they’d extend the same grace and tolerance they want to people who are “different” because they’re LGBTQ, or “different” because they’re in an open relationship or marriage.
9:15pm I mix together oatmeal chocolate chip cookie batter and put some cookies in the oven. While I’m waiting, I browse Zocdoc for well-reviewed providers—I want to make a podiatrist appointment for a lingering toe issue and an audiologist appointment for a routine hearing screening. I got the idea to make these appointments since I’ll hit my out-of-pocket max with the hospital visit, making them free or very discounted. I make two appointments for next week.
I also lust over a Farm Rio puffer jacket that feels overpriced but I just love. Maybe I’ll buy it tomorrow since they’re having a 30% off sale.
Day 4 Total: $64.50
Day 5 Sunday, November 29 8:58am Wake up and switch between scrolling on Reddit and playing a few Among Us games. After a bit Will gets out of bed and makes coffee for us.
9:45am Will finishes the movie he started last night and we start on breakfast. We’re making the bacon I bought yesterday, breakfast potatoes with onions, and a fried egg for Will (I can’t stand the taste or smell).
11:00am Yum! Breakfast was great. I watch a couple episodes of Sister Wives and mull over buying that ridiculous but amazing puffer jacket from Farm Rio. I’ve still been thinking about it since last night and I might take the plunge.
1:25pm I get a jolt of motivation to work out and do a 20 minute Sydney Cummings video on Youtube. I heard about it from a recent Money Diary posted here! After it’s done I’m so, so tired. I stretch and unpause my episode of Sister Wives.
2:22pm I help Will move the butcher block slab for his desk out to our backyard. We live on the first floor of a single-family home that was converted into apartments, so we get the backyard too—it’s awesome to have outdoor space in the city. P works on sanding it and applying poly for the next couple hours.
5:07pm Will suggests pizza for dinner and I am always, always down for pizza. I order pickup from the spot down the street—one grandma, one cheese and 2 orders of garlic knots come to $38.60. We’ll have leftovers for tomorrow too.
$19.30 5:50pm We pick up the pizza and dig in. While we’re eating we turn on the Chiefs vs. Buccaneers game; Will has a few players on his fantasy team in this game.
6:57pm I sign up to write letters to Georgia residents encouraging them to vote in the Senate runoff elections in January. This is through Vote Forward—I did 20 letters for the general election in November and want to participate again. I’ll print the letters at a local coffee shop since we don’t have a printer at home.
Will sends me
this Reddit comment about campaign finance since we’ve been talking about it recently. I decide I’m convinced by the argument and set up a $5 monthly donation to Brand New Congress.
$5 8:19pm After texting back and forth with my friend all day, I buy the puffer jacket—so excited. She encouraged me to get it and is pumped for me too.
$228.64 I also notice my paycheck has started processing in my checking account (I get paid tomorrow), so I enter the amount in YNAB and budget it all. I earmark about $1500 to go into my brokerage account tomorrow. I won’t include it here as “spending” since it’s included in the overview section above.
Day 5 Total: $252.94
Day 6 Monday, November 30 8:43am Wake up and turn on my Slack. Will started the coffee process and I finish it up by pouring the water into our Chemex and letting it steep (I know there’s a coffee-centric word for this...).
8:56am I check my Citi card and my YouTube TV trial rolled over—I was going to cancel it this morning, which I thought was the last day. I email support to see if they’ll refund me, because (I promise I’m not just saying this!) I did have a pretty bad experience. The Roku app was glitchy for us every time we watched something. Maybe they’ll feel nice today!
$64.99 9:35am After responding to a few work messages, I run out the door to the post office to avoid a long package line. I did the Warby Parker 5-day home try on and have to return my box of glasses today. I found a pair I really like and am excited to get in the habit of wearing glasses again, instead of just my contacts.
Thankfully the line is only a few people long. The employees are also super nice every time I go, so I try to be really pleasant too. The lines are usually long and I’ve seen more than one adult have a fit at this post office. It’s rainy today and I couldn’t find our umbrella, so my flimsy rain jacket gets pretty soaked through on the walk back.
11:35am My podiatrist appointment is supposed to be tomorrow morning, and they call me to tell me since I haven’t hit my deductible, I’ll have to pay out of pocket for the visit. I explain that I’m 100% going to hit my deductible, the claims from the hospital just haven’t processed yet. I ask her to bill my insurance first for the visit, then I can pay whatever ends up not being covered (if anything). She agrees!
Maybe this is standard, but I’ve never had it happen before—even if I haven’t hit my deductible, I’ve always been to offices that bill insurance first, then I pay the remaining balance.
1:05pm Lots of meetings today. I break for lunch and heat up the braised chicken with veggies. It’s definitely on its last good day, so I’m glad I used it up. Still yummy!
2:20pm Woohoo! Get an email that my YouTube TV charge was refunded.
-$64.99 Will ran to Home Depot today to buy some tools for his desk and also got a shower curtain liner since ours is ripping. I go to put it up in the bathroom but my arms are so sore—like I got my flu shot type of sore.
5:05pm Sign off work after trying to wrangle a supremely frustrating SQL query. I don’t get it but figure I can ask our analyst team for help tomorrow. Will will have a late night working, so pizza and Sister Wives is in my near future.
While watching, I update YNAB to reflect the end-of-month balances for my investment accounts. I get a huge dopamine hit by seeing my net worth number go up. I’m also anticipating it going down a bit next month because of my medical bills, so I relish the moment.
8:09pm It suddenly dawns on me that my arms are sore because I worked out yesterday. It’s so rare now that I literally forget when I do it. Ha!
9:15pm We watch the Eagles vs. Seahawks game and I absentmindedly play Among Us. I end up getting ...bullied by a person playing it? They get mad that I figured out they were the imposter and start saying all these schoolyard-type digs throughout the next couple rounds, but level 100 of cruel.
I’m embarrassed by how sad it makes me but think maybe it’s a good thing I don’t immediately know what to say to bully people back. Such a weird experience. I end up going to bed around 11:30.
Day 6 Total: $0
Day 7 December 1, 2020 7:07am Wake up late for my alarm at 7. I’m up a lot earlier today because my podiatrist appointment is first thing. I get dressed in the dark, kiss P goodbye, grab my water bottle and run out the door to the subway by 7:30.
$2.75 8:10am Get to my stop and swing by Starbucks before the appointment. I get a vanilla latte and the bacon cheddar and egg sandwich. Total is around $10 but I have a gift card loaded onto my Starbucks app.
My spending here went way down when I switched jobs to an office not close to a Starbucks, and then stopped going into an office at all.
8:30am My appointment goes great, if a little painful when she numbs my toe. I had to get an ingrown toenail removed. I danced ballet and pointe for years so I’m (unfortunately) used to them, but this one was terrible. The doctor and I bond over both being dancers with bad feet and they schedule me for a follow up two weeks out.
She actually says there’s been a rise in these procedures because people aren’t getting pedicures since the pandemic and aren’t cutting their toenails well! Wild.
I look silly on the subway in December wearing Birkenstocks and socks with a huge toe bandage. It looks like one of those cartoon characters who stubs their toe and it becomes 10x bigger than their other toes.
$2.75 9:40am I get off at the stop before mine to stop at Rite Aid. I grab Neosporin, band-aids and epsom salt and check my notes for anything else she mentioned about caring for my toe.
$12.97 10:00am When I get home, I hop into work and working with our engineers on a promotion for the New Year. I also catch up with Will since he stayed up late last night and I got up early for my appointment. He says he ended up staying up until 3:30am (!!) cleaning up his tools, working on his desk and putting up the shower curtain. I’m floored that he is functional right now after waking up at 8.
12:15pm Heat up the last of the pizza for lunch, along with hummus and carrots.
5:20pm Work is average-paced for the rest of the day. Not doing nothing, not totally over my head. Will puts in potatoes for baked potatoes to have later, which we’ll pair with a salad. We’re getting close to needing a grocery run again, so the meals are becoming more of a mishmash.
We listed a couple things on our local Buy Nothing group last week, so a woman comes by to pick up a wifi router we can’t use anymore. Would totally recommend looking up if there’s a group in your area—they’re usually on Facebook.
6:30pm After dinner I watch more Sister Wives and look up RIP Medical Debt, a nonprofit one of my friends shared for Giving Tuesday. They buy unpaid medical debt from collections, so $1 ends up paying off $100 of someone’s medical debt. I give $50 to the Arkansas campaign, which will clear $5,000 of medical debt.
As Will said earlier today, “medical billing in America is a racket” so I really hope this helps clear a burden from an individual or family. Doing this reminds me to check my insurance portal, which is steadily going up as each separate claim comes in. Ahhhh, modern healthcare!
$51.49 At the end of each day please tally up your daily expenses. Then at the end of your diary please tally up all expenses in the following categories: Total: $719.33 - Grocery + Dining Out: $157.77
- Fun + Entertainment: $0
- Home + Health: $164.67
- Clothes + Beauty: $228.64
- Transportation: $11.00
- Gifts + Giving: $157.25
Reflection This week felt like a big spending week for me. I checked YNAB and since January, I’ve spent about $1600 per month, not including rent—so about $400/week. That’s why this week’s $719 feels so high!
Writing this diary helped me understand how many things I have going for me. I’ve recently been in a huge funk—about my health, my performance at work and my relationships with family, friends and P. Going to the hospital, needing physical therapy to have sex and being in a pandemic will do that to you.
I was able to zoom out a bit and understand how stable and gratifying my life is. That being said, I’m so glad this community exists. I really love it and learning about all your spending and saving habits. Thanks for being here and sharing :)
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